Since childhood, I have witnessed family feuds in almost every family, including mine, relatives, around my area and everywhere I went, have seen situations going from bad to worse, and have seen people who once lived in harmony turning from friends to foes, fighting for something they would have never imagined they will fight for. This mostly happens between siblings and sometimes with parents who they grew up with. There comes a situation when they don’t even want to see each other and eventually, a good family is broken, they get separated. This has been a sad story in almost every family but the good thing is that it’s not 100%, many choose to live in harmony.
It doesn’t happen in a day or month; many try to solve this but still they fail.
But why this happens? What’s the root cause? Why do many fail to save their families?
These may be some reasons that I have observed:
Lack of Good Education
This is a big problem in India, according to Wikipedia, the male literacy rate is 82.14% while the female literacy rate is 81%. The numbers have improved over the years but still a big task to make it to 100%. Also, when I say good education, I am referring to life and social education that most schools or colleges don’t teach. They should teach these skills as required to live a good life, but mostly we are taught to get degrees from reputed colleges and earn money, we are not taught life and social skills. The relationship is one of those life skills mostly lack and that’s the reason why many have not been able to manage their relationships.
Lack of Good Communication
Bad communication often results in conflict, if communication is not constructive, it leads to confusion and the other party can start making negative assumptions. It usually happens and causes conflicts. Good communication involves a constructive discussion and works on resolving issues through a dialogue.
Bad Language
Using aggressive, foul, and rude language can make things from bad to worse. A simple argument turns into a fight when things are not addressed sensibly, aggression is not the solution.
Lack of Leadership
If two people are fighting, someone from the family especially elders has to step up to stop that fight/argument by acting as a mediator. But, in many cases, it doesn’t happen, even they get involved which makes things worse. Elders have to behave like leaders and must try hard to maintain a good environment in a family.
Backbiting
This is something everyone needs to avoid as it may anger your colleagues, closed ones, or loved ones and may break your relationships with them. You can imagine how bad it is when you do it for your family members; this may cause serious conflict.
Jealousy
Those who are jealous, can’t be happy seeing other success or happiness and keep getting anxious about it. This also happens within a family and becomes a reason for conflict. It starts with comparison and constantly doing it causes jealousy.
Provocation
Some people around you can’t see you and your family living happily and find a way to create bad blood in your family. These people may be very close to you or sometimes from your family.
Kids Involvement
Some people prepare their kids for revenge and it continues for another generation. They feed their kids’ minds with all the negatives and bad things that happened to them. By doing this, they are only ruining their kid’s future and destroying family culture.
